Crystalize the onions Fuckbrain Comix thumbnail

Hey kids!

As some of you may know, my brain doesn’t always get words right. It’s always been a problem with my gray matter, but the older I get, the more my brain misfires and makes me sound like I’m having a stroke.

I don’t always keep track of them, but I’m starting to, and I’m going to start drawing as many of them as I can. The first one was a misfire while talking to Nadja about a recipe I was going to make with a number of onions, which aren’t Nadja’s stomach’s favorite if they’re not very cooked. I was asking about a change I could make.

Please enjoy my first I Don’t Words Talk Right:

Crystalize the onions Fuckbrain Comix

Doing a completed drawing every few days isn’t exactly #Inktober, but #Drawtober works just fine with me.

Tomorrow you might have the horrifyingly blood-soaked very strange next bit of The Wizard’s Lesson as well as a bit about the best new horror movie I’ve seen in ages.


Who’d crystallize YOUR onions any day….

Fuckbrain Comix Urinal Beast thumbnail

Apologies for my website’s misbehaving last week. It seems that most people couldn’t see this comic due to some anti-spam plugin malfunction, so I’ve reposted it.

I’ve had the plugin shot.

Nearly everything in my Fuckbrain Comix has actually happened. Sure, I’ve never actually had a dog cry at me, or had my brain leap out of my head, but with the exception of a smidge of little white lies—you wouldn’t begrudge me a little hyperbole…a drop—all of these events are true. There’s a fun difference with this one, though. Most of the other ones have been very brain-specific to me. But with this…

YOU can pretend it was happening to YOU.
YOU can imagine the smell, the sounds, the revulsion.
The only thing you can’t do is Choose Your Own Adventure.

If you don’t have the genitalia or aim to put yourself in my shoes—stop looking between my legs—then take some lessons or pretend that you’re using one of these.

Now then, let’s talk about the people to whom I wanted to shout…

Fuckbrain Comix Urinal Beast
Fuckbrain Comix Urinal Beast 2
Fuckbrain Comix Urinal Beast 3

You can still smell it, can’t you? Don’t think about the bottom of your shoes.



Fuckbrain Comix Presents Using a Public Restroom 2

I’m marginally surprised that nobody seems to have found my Easter Egg in Tuesday’s comic….

In any event, today’s Fuckbrain Classic is from 8 years ago, when my OCD was far worse than it is now. While I still stick to most of the rules in this comic, I’ve been able to overcome a few of them.

Fuckbrain Comix Presents Using a Public Restroom 2

I’m just wigging the fuck out of y’all this week, aren’t I?




I absolutely despise when one of my conditions rears its head while I’m doing something important. One of the most infuriating is when my OCD flips on while I’m drawing.

I tossed this off after struggling mightily on the first page of the Chinese folk tale I’m drawing as my next project. Let’s not talk about how much I did this last night:

OCD when drawing

My drawing style kind of hinges around me not taking a preposterous amount of to do it. Part of the “charm” is that there’s a spontaneity to the pieces, and that if you look carefully you can see all the mistakes I’ve tried to digitally remove. Over-thinking my art condemns me to a purgatory of questioning each pencil mark, the opposite of what I want.

So be it.

Here’s a photo of the side-entrance to Stone-Robot Enterprises for you. We don’t use it much because, a) We’re hippies, b) It’s protected by golems not created by us.


New Fuckbrain Comix up tomorrow or Wednesday.


Who may be sick